Oh, Discretion

I have learned a valuable lesson this week.  Discretion is a valuable thing.  There are people who have none, and badly need it.  There are those who think they have it, and don't.  We are those who didn't think we needed it, but do!  We are five months into this journey and I thought that the opposition and questioning from our family was over, OH was I wrong.  The saddest part is that they don't even know that their constant questioning and doubt is incredibly distracting and doesn't help in any way.

Broken Window

This has been a whopper of a week and I am just about done with this whole thing.   For those who don't have experience with a RAD child, it is the most heartbreaking, disturbing, relentless, awful, and soul destroying thing ever.  Imagine giving a child everything, sacrificing everything in your life to give to them and having them ooze hatred and spite for you. It's hard for people with healthy kids to imagine it, but that is my life with Jake.

Tuseday, Updated...

Ok, if you didn't read my last entry, go there and read it first.  I wrote that entry Tuesday morning.  This entry is to tell the rest of last Tuesday's story.  It's a good one, involving police!

Tuesdays

Tuesdays are pretty hard for me.  It is the weekday that Jake is at home with me.  They usually start uneventful, then by the end of the day we have had some huge catastrophe.  I will use last week as an example.  At mid day last week, my girls were at school and the baby was taking a nap so I took Jake to his room for "quiet time" so I could rest.  Jake immediately demanded entertainment.  This gives me the hint where his mind is.  So, naturally I could not oblige his requests as it is a control thing for him.

Frustration and Progress

I haven't been writing as often lately because, thank goodness, I have found that God has blessed me with people to help me vent and share my life's struggles.  But I know that I have been commanded to share my journey to help myself and others.  I have been so frustrated with the reality that Jake has agency to chose his life's direction.  He is so young and so broken that he doesn't see that the things he is choosing are keeping him sad, afraid, lonely, angry, and stagnant.

Happy Holidays? I survived

I'm back!  I feel as if I have let some of you readers down, (as if there are many) by not writing what we went through over the holidays.  It was so fun that I couldn't find the time to sit and write! NOT!  Really what was going on is that ever since Thanksgiving Jake has been on a really badmean streak.  He has been so nasty and so stubborn that we went into shelter mode and just shut down.